Brain is hard

After my snake exercise, I have been in search of a solution for my biggest disadvantage – productivity (mostly managing time). My work routine is chaotic, and I have a hard time starting things (even the ones I enjoy) Thing that concerned me the most is that even under pressure I was too scared to start. So, I started with meditation, because it helps me to calm my mind down and manage my emotions. I was doing it from time to time before, but past month or so I’ve started doing it more and it helped me improve my control of emotions. It is especially helpful when I’m stressed. Another part of the problem is a lack of confidence that I think comes from low self-esteem. It’s not easy to just start to treat yourself better, but I’m doing lots of positive self-talk and just trying to think of myself as a “separate” person like a family member or something like that. This is a weird concept to explain, but that way it is easier for me to respect myself. I also was thinking a lot about myself and changed my perspective on some things. Usually, these processes happen in my subconscious, so it is hard to talk about them because I’m not sure how I got to some of the thoughts myself. Okay, so a week or so ago I was watching a show and was a bit sad that it is still really hard to start things and my mind gifted me with an idea. It was really simple I was trying to explain to myself that it shouldn’t be that scary, so stick a piece of paper to a wall next to my bed and wrote down daily tasks and next to them how much time they would take. I knew about the 2-minute rule and I think it is similar to that. Also, I can do the task any time I want, so it relieves the stress of missing time. After doing it for a week, I can say that it works for me, but not perfectly. I think the most helpful of all I did was positive self-talk. Actually, I’m able to write this post only because I was really kind to myself today.

The moral of the story is “be kind to yourself!” and “treat yourself!”

And at the end of the day, I’m just doing my best and it’s okay that I can’t be as productive as others or that I feel bad sometimes. Simply allowing myself to be imperfect was a big breakthrough. And I know that no matter what I’m making progress.

Eugenia Mello (I found this image on Google)